1. |
isolationist
03:43
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Apparently I’m an isolationist
I turn the AC up and hold my face to buttercups
I’ve been talking about my addictions lately
Like writing love notes in the dark
And drinking box wine to smash the patriarchy
Something’s wrong with human beings
Today I’ll choose my dog or maybe kiss some frog
One day I’ll be old and married to
Personified post cards and cut off jeans
Anthropomorphic art and Dairy Queen
Oowee honestly
I’m sick of rooms and blurry screens
Oowee honestly
Oowee I’ve worn out all the novelty
Sometimes I smell like burnt espresso
I try to control my dreams and be more than a machine
If my only companion was my dog
I’d be okay with going out
In a spaceship so I don’t touch the ground
I feel like I’m at senior prom again
In the corner without a friend
Trying to exist in the same space as people
Who only know how to pretend
Don’t get me wrong I could be someone who is
Destined to play along
To the same song that they all sway to when they’re dancing on their own
If they elected prom queen based on number of tears that you cried
I would have won that royalty and plastic crown by a landslide
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2. |
common core
04:35
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Swimming pools filled with lawn chairs
And we’re laughing in the lens flare
Asking questions like do you love me anymore
Or have you closed that door
Don’t ask me if it hurts
I don’t wanna think about it
Superstitions and premonitions
Are all I have without it
I’ve been watching as the moon shifts
Stuck getting higher in hotel lifts
Eating cheap food off of countertops
You and I and the black sky backdrop
Don’t ask me if I miss you
I’m writing poetry alone
Superstitions and premonitions
Are all I have to go on
Sometimes I do embarrass myself
Thinking about the common core
I’d stay out on the porch all evening
To keep you from leaving the ocean shore
Maybe I have never done anything for anyone
Making white boys cry in classrooms
While I’m crying in the bathroom
His eyes are clementines and they look just like mine
Would it be enough to love him out of everyone
Would it be enough to say that I loved
That week before the quarantine
When I caught you dancing in the dark
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3. |
half-assed poetry
03:22
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Yesterday I lost my favorite sneakers
But I found them under the bleachers
And now I’m crying at the news
I’m not crying over you
I’ve been thinking about lying
And how it takes a bit of trying
To pump your veins with silver and blues
But I’m hoping I’ll just cruise
I’ve got a list of people that I have kissed
And I get bored quick ‘cause this is half-assed poetry
Not self-abuse, I’ve come up with an excuse
But I’m getting used to it it’s just psychiatry
I’m just lying on the sofa
Like a drugged out supernova
And you call me an adult
What a god damn great insult
Love to feel the post-party haze
And extra vacation days
Put on my shades when it’s dark outside
Try not to backslide
But lists are only quantifiable
And they make my love deniable
When the details are erased
As my excuses turn to cop-outs
My choices turn to doubt
And I feel like it’s a waste
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4. |
school street
04:33
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I soak up sunlight at 2pm on Tuesdays
And I’m striking matches to try to keep my mind at bay
I’m stuck on School St just behind the evergreen
If you could hear me I could be your everything
We got a snow storm and the next day it was spring again
I stood at the turnstile smiling every now and then
I don’t want money, it’s paper I can do without
I just want you near me before I start to breakdown
I see their faces only through computer screens
And I’m sick of time zones and poorly charged AI machines
The stores are empty and I feel like drinking
But I don’t like alcohol, it feeds overthinking
I want you to send your location
I could use a vacation
I would drive 600 miles
To escape isolation
I’m getting tired of popsicles and bookshelves
Reminds me of when Bowie died and we all kept to ourselves
I’m missing you more than I want to
I’m still on School St just behind the evergreen
If you can hear me I wanna be your everything
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5. |
grapefruit sky
02:59
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All my friends are tired and wired
And I just took a nap but it was stopped by a fire drill
If I played a varsity sport do you think they’d ignore
The fact that I’m not the prettiest girl on the dance floor
I’m in a grapefruit sky
And living’s a promise that we make if we’re qualified
I’ll do an exorcism of my ex if you’ll
Be on my team for the rest of this small life
Send me your location on a Saturday night
If it’s the spring maybe there will be some light
If I show you my favorite song will you sing along
Or will it make me think of everything I did wrong
Let’s pretend I’m enrolled in calculus two
If I’m in STEM does that mean much to you
Does it benefit my score or my societal class
If I tell you that my heart can break like glass
Should I be proud of what I’ve done
And who I’ve become
Around you
Does it give you peace of mind
Knowing that I’m blind
But it’s all true
I’m in a grapefruit sky
And living’s a promise that we make if we’re qualified
I’ll do an exorcism of my ex if you’ll
Be on my team for the rest of this small life
I had a dream last night
That college home teams never lost the fight
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